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I just love this commercial...#thatsall

Will Randy Moss get a library card?

So, Randy Moss is playing for the Tennessee Titans now...right? And I walked through the Nashville Public Library's downtown branch recently and came across this...



Not that it REALLY matters...but what do y'all think? Take the poll, leave a comment.





And Randy Moss, if you can read, I mean...if you're reading this and want to weigh in -- I'll allow it.

Something About Colored Girls & a Rainbow

OH!

Tyler Perry’s For Colored Girls is coming out this weekend. But don’t worry – I’m not going to urge you to go see it, nor am I going to give you reason not to go see it.



At some point, I plan to see it for myself…opening weekend or otherwise. How else could I come back and give you all the in-depth review you’re looking forward to reading? Plus, I like the cast…so I’m hopeful.



ANYWAY --- this post is NOT about the movie, it is about Ntozake Shange and her choreopoem, For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf. This is the literary work that Tyler Perry used to create the movie. The choreopoem was introduced to me many years ago. So, when I heard that Mr. Perry would be bringing the story to the big screen I was (and remain) indifferent. Let me see the movie, then we'll see how I feel...

I’ve read many books that people later make into movies. Sometimes you can barely recognize the book in the motion picture, other times the movie is a phenomenal visual compliment to the written work. --- I have NO idea what Tyler Perry’s For Colored Girls is going to be when matched up with Ntozake Shange’s For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf. Nor do I know whether or not the movie will, itself, be “good” or “bad”. BUT I do know that I want you people, yes…YOU PEOPLE…to read Ntozake Shange’s For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf.

I intended to post this further away from the movie’s opening weekend, in the hopes that with more time, more people would embrace READING before viewing. However, even with Friday right around the corner, there is more than enough time to get it in. The entire work is like 70 pages, so you can do it [I believe in you]. Buy it, borrow it, sit in B&N and read it…do something.

If nothing else, you can say “I read that book…” And this is mainly for all of you who were mad at Tyler Perry for the content of Precious, when you never bothered to read Sapphire’s Push.



So, READ THE BOOK…I’ll be re-reading it BEFORE going to see the movie!

Don’t forget to check back in a week or so and see if my review is up…I’ll be looking forward to your thoughts and comments.

[Dear Tyler Perry…what’s up with all these light skin brothers in this cast?]

Why Did I See THIS Movie Too?

This is a long overdue “movie review” that has kind of just been sitting on my laptop, not getting posted. So, let’s get to it…

Five Things You Need to Know Before Reading This Entry:
(1) I have a love/hate relationship with Tyler Perry’s movies & plays.
(2) I absolutely LOVED Why Did I Get Married? [the movie]
(3) I did not HATE this movie, but I was NOT as happy with it as I was with the first one.
(4) This is not a real movie review – it is just me pointing out how I feel about certain aspects of the movie.
(5) At this point I’m figuring if you wanted to see the movie, you’ve seen it by now. If not – just be advised that you’ll be reading some specifics about the movie in this post. So if you have managed to avoid spoilers and don’t want this to be one – leave now & come back after you’ve seen the movie.

Be prepared to be here for a while. There is a lot to read. And you should read it all. Oh yeah – and comment, I REALLY want to hear feedback from y’all on this movie.

My apathy toward this film began when I first saw the title in print: Why Did I Get Married Too? Uh, that literally vexed my soul. I shan’t offer any more detail about that, because you won’t appreciate it. Just know that I don’t like it…

The Characters:

Angela: She was definitely over the top, more so than she was in the first movie. Nevertheless, she was consistently ridiculous, so I already knew not to expect much else from her.
Marcus: It appears that he has gotten himself together, career wise. He still has a problem telling the truth though – and that just will never be okay with me.

Patricia: She DEFINITELY needs to see someone to talk HER problems out with and be real with about stuff, because her inability to do so with her husband or friends is destructive.
Gavin: I never really felt one way or another about him. He’s kind of a real background player in everything that has been going on. His character was starting to develop a little more, but that was ended quickly.

Shelia: Honey, I am glad you got out of that toxic relationship and have gained a little self confidence, but I need you to make some better life choices.
Officer Troy: I do not buy this guy as the angry type. Fine as he may be, he did not pull that off well at all.

Dianne: She still gets on my nerves. In both her marriage and her friendships she comes across as bogus to me.
Terry: This guy is real punkish. Always has been, apparently he always will be.

Mike: As is to be expected, he has gotten exactly what he deserved as far as relationships go. However, his newly introduced medical battle is a poor attempt to give his character depth and gain viewer sympathy. I’m not interested. He is still a jerk.

The Movie:

The Move.
So Troy and Shelia moved from Colorado to Atlanta at some point in the last three years. He hasn’t been able to find a job and she doesn’t appear to be looking for one. I hated the implications this chunk of the story carried. Their situation screams of irresponsibility, piss poor planning, and all manner of craziness! Troy leaves a SECURE job as Sheriff (or whatever) and sells a lucrative (as far as I could tell) business in the general store to move to Atlanta without so much as a promise of a job stocking shelves at the local grocery store? All to be closer to Shelia’s mother? That sounds real – STOOPID! I mean, let’s be serious. If Shelia was home sick…let her mom come up for some extended visits. Let Shelia hit Atlanta every other month or something. But pick up and move, with your fingers crossed? Yeah, that sounds like a recipe for disaster.

As a result, they are now having money problems and much to Troy’s chagrin, everybody else knows about it. My main question here is this – if y’all finances are jacked up, why the hell are you pissing money away on this vacation/marriage retreat? Honestly, for people that you live in the same state/town with – missing a vacation one year would not have kill you. You have a child to take care of and a marriage to maintain.

So Much For Quitting.
Did Angela and Marcus not go through a whole lovely scene at the end of the last movie where she vowed to stop drinking to save their marriage? Am I the only one who saw that AND respected her for that? Yet, here we are, not a good twenty minutes into the movie, and she’s pulling out a flask? This was disappointing. Very disappointing.

The Odd Couple.
I think that something better could have come from the characters that Cicely Tyson and Louis Gossett Jr. played. Their introduction into the movie was weird, with the ashes and the wind and Angela’s scene. But when the couples had their little “why I got married” session on the beach, they kind of dropped some good wisdom. Too bad none of the couples seemed to absorb it and really try to live it. And then they were gone just as awkwardly as they'd arrived.

The Soulfood Scene.
Any of you worth your weight in black movies should already know what this is referencing. When Shelia walked into that restaurant with Mike and asked him to talk to his buddy about getting her husband, Troy, a job – we all knew it wasn’t going to be a smooth endeavor. I immediately had flashbacks to Soulfood when Lem took that tray to Simuel’s head in the cafeteria. I could already see Officer Troy getting wind of this matter and going ham…

Liquor.
I’m sorry, but I laughed a little when Gavin was trying to pour that liquor down Patricia’s throat. Then I laughed even more when, after setting fire to the pictures, he began tossing the liquor at her like it was Holy Water and he was casting out demons. The power of Christ compels you…

Fichus Key.
New Infomercial: Is your marriage falling apart? Has your wife changed the locks on you? Don’t despair! Try the “FICHUS KEY”! Just pick it up any decorative fichus or potted plant and throw it through the glass door. It’s as good as any key! Problem solved!
This scene was funny to me, because Gavin was real cool standing outside when Terry and Marcus pulled up. Then, BOOM - fichus through the door!

I Get Lonely.
Why did Patricia show up to Gavin’s job looking like she was wearing the outfit from Janet's I Get Lonely video? Don’t tell me I’m the only one who noticed it! LOL – I cannot lie, I was some type of excited when I thought she was about to snap her fingers and hit that dance sequence. IN FACT, that would have made this movie WORTH the $5.00 I paid for the matinee showing.


But, that’s not what she did – instead we got this…

Birthday Cake.
THIS SCENE WAS UTTERLY RIDICULOUS! *searching the internet for Tyler Perry’s phone number* After the cake rolled in, I racked my brain trying to fathom what could possibly be getting ready to burst out of it. NOTHING that happened leading up to that point in this movie prepared me for the fruity little guy that jumped out dancing and singing. Sure in the movie it was a tasteless move on Patricia’s part to roll up to that man’s job with that foolishness, regardless of what they had going on at home. This scene, however, also caused a loss of respect for a one Mr. Tyler Perry for even writing something like this into HIS production.

Wife Tracking.
At some point Terry begins rattling off dates and whatnot of times when he noticed some changes with Dianne that made him suspicious of her faithfulness to their marriage: “63 days ago,” “February 17th,” “March 8th.” You have suspected your wife is cheating on you for SIXTY-THREE days…and you are just NOW saying something? You got dates memorized about what she was wearing and all that, but you’ve just been sitting back and letting it happen? There is something wrong with that.

The Accident.
*looking both ways before crossing the street* WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT??? Gavin takes off to get away from crazy Patricia and now he is dead? Aside from the fact that I REALLY do not think Gavin should have been killed off, I don’t buy this whole scene at all. I only had to see it once to see so much. First of all, dude hops in his car and floors it without any kind of regard for safe driving. I’ve seen other movies and I’ve seen real life situations where people drove off mad, but they knew how to stop at an intersection and make sure it was safe to proceed. Second, dude never turned the wheel to make it look like he was even trying to be on the road like a normal driver. In fact his car was straight across both lanes when he was hit. It appeared to me that he was trying to drive straight into the wooded area on the other side of the road. Third, his car was hit on the passenger side – AND there was nothing on his side of the car (that I saw) for him to hit, be pushed into, or injured by. Yet he DIED? Stop trying to play me for a fool Tyler Perry! If you want me to believe that Gavin died in that accident that I saw, then you need to roll the tape back and show me something more believable. Until then, I will believe that he walked away from it and is now in Colorado as a Sherriff.

OH! And why did EVERYONE from the building/office follow them outside?

Fix It.
That whole scene at the hospital made me sick. I think it was after being told that Gavin was dead that Patricia begins pushing her friends to one another crying “Fix it. Fix it. Fix it.” I realize that the reality of her loss was probably setting in and making her wish she had conducted herself differently in the minutes, hours, days, months, and even years leading up to that moment – but surely she didn’t believe that everything was going to flip for her friends and their marriages just like that. And the way it played out, where they all just kind of embraced and magically were over their issues was faulty. Show them talking, even if we cannot hear what they are saying. Show them WORKING toward a solution, not just being pushed into something over a tragedy. Am I the only one who feels like this?

The Ending.
There is this beautiful “funeral” scene. Then all of a sudden Patricia is being introduced to some random guy in a parking lot? It’s not even that it was a bad ending, it was just BAD. As with most everything else that took place in this movie, this ending seemed like it was developed without regard to the rest of the movie. And I didn’t like the fact that of all the messages that this movie could have ended with, to possibly redeem itself from the mediocrity of the film, it ended on this shallow note. Am I saying that Patricia doesn’t deserve to move on and get herself a new man? I am not saying that at all. But from the point of Gavin’s death, until this moment in the parking lot – we, the audience, have not be privy to any information that would suggest that she has taken the time that she needs (even before Gavin died) to work on HER issues so that she could be in a healthy relationship. And unfortunately, given the track record of things, I cannot and will not assume that such healing and closure has taken place unless it is specifically spelled out.

Miscellaneous Madness.
The Roc? Wait, excuse me…Dwayne Johnson? REALLY? He does NOT mesh well with this cast, AT ALL. So, I guess it is good that if he HAD to be a part of this movie it was at the very end for a very short period of time. But let’s talk about Patricia’s reaction to him. Her gaze at him went from his feet up – per the way the camera moved for the audience to see. And each time the camera showed her, she was all too giddy. It was just “funny” to me how she went from not even wanting to let her coworker get a sentence out about possibly meeting with this guy, to looking like she was about to drop panties in the parking lot.

A Third?
I have not heard any plans for a third installment to this movie series, and I am glad about that. HOWEVER, that does not mean that it is not going to happen. If in fact something surfaces, I do hope Tyler Perry takes time to read this and other blogs like this – ones that do not just sing the praises of everything he does. Like I said earlier, I have a love/hate relationship with his productions…some stuff I love, other stuff I tolerate, and the rest I just walk away from. I will sign on as a consultant for a third installation, because it would be nice to bring this thing full circle – tie up loose ends and set some things in order. Unfortunately I would not be able to bring Gavin back. And he deserved a better ending.

There may be more from me, but this is long enough for one entry. Tell me YOUR thoughts in the comment section below!

Roadside Creeping

Went out to get lunch today and this happened:

I hear a vehicle coming behind me, but I’m on the sidewalk, so I’m not really paying attention to it or worrying about being in the way. After a few seconds, enough time for it to have passed me walking, it is still behind me. So I turned my head a little, because I know people who like to just pull up on the side of the road behind me like that’s proper. Turn around and it’s some older other woman in a jeep creeping behind me. And when she gets to where I’m alongside the window she hollers out “Can I give you a ride? It’s hot out there.”

Ummm…this is a question I hear a lot and it always baffles me why complete strangers want to offer rides to me or anyone else they see walking up the road, but don’t know. You have NO idea who I am, I could be crazy [oh, wait I am], I could be dangerous [guess that one is kind of true too], and I could decide to rob you or something crazy.

And on the flip side of that, I don’t know you. I’m not hoping in a car with someone who doesn’t know me and doesn’t even know where I am heading. You could be crazy, dangerous, and criminal too! Yeah, it’s hot – I knew that before I stepped outside. If I couldn’t handle it, I would have stayed inside.

Lesson for the masses: stop offering strangers a ride. It’s not safe for you & that mess is creepy as hell!